Warning: Embarrassing details inside

So here I sit.  I've just been injected with radioactive fluid that will turn me into Spider-Man.  Ok, maybe not, but the metal container it comes in makes me feel like a science experiment. Anywho, I'm lounging for the next hour until the fluid works it's way through my bloodstream.  Then I'll sit in a machine for 45 minutes and the results from that will tell my doctor whether the chemo and radiation treatments worked or not. 

It's PET scan day. 

I asked my doc yesterday to confirm that he'll call me when he gets the results.  I don't see him for another 2 weeks and I can pretty much guarantee I can't wait that long to find out what's going on.  I'm not a worrier, but I'm a tad bit anxious about where I stand in the cancer game.

Life has been kind of getting back to normal.  From talking to family and friends, I've found that everyone thinks I'm back to the same ol Lesley.  I'm not there yet, but I'm working on it!

The weeks following treatment, even though you're not physically receiving treatment, the treatment you had is still working on your body.  I'm told this is why you don't get scanned immediately after treatment ends.  When treatment is over, they pretty much send you on your way and you recover....and wait.

You know what prescription the doctors did give me after my treatment was done?  Not drugs....but sex.  Because that's just what I want to jump into after putting my lady parts through all that hell.  Awesome. Sign me up.  You know what happens if I don't "fill my prescription"? My hoo hoo closes.  Yup.  You read that right.  That's a thing.  Seriously.  Nobody wants that. 

I know you're dying for more embarrassing details and frankly that's what I'm here for....to embarrass myself.  At the last meeting with my radiation crew they gave me a gift.  The gift being a dialator.  It was like a sex toy party with every ounce of fun sucked out of it.  Like your parent giving you the sex talk and you just want to sit there with your fingers in your ears saying "lalalalala".  Yeah. Thanks.  I'll just stick that in my purse and be on my way. 

I know it sounds like it should be fun.  And, really, who doesn't want to be prescribed that?  But simply said, without going into details, it's not fun for me.  At all.  This part of the cancer game is going to be a long road.

In other news....

Turns out I have quite a bit of scar tissue that's wreaking havoc on my lower back.  I'm still trying to figure this part out.  I knew when I was done with treatment that my muscles around my lower back and abdomen (the radiation sites) just felt different.  I still can't explain it.  It feels really tight, but not just overuse/sore muscle tight.  Just different.  I started out seeing a physical therapist.  She gave me many, many stretches to do and those have been helping, but just a little. The first time she touched my lower back, she immediately told me how bad it was and said I could benefit from massage (who couldn't?). 

My next step was seeing a personal trainer.  I lost about 25 lbs during my 7 weeks of treatment.  Pretty sure it was all muscle.  I wanted to start working out again but I was a little afraid as my body felt so much different.  It was important to me that I found someone that has experience with cancer patients - that knows that my body is different.  I found her and she's kicking my butt and it's fabulous.  But we're still having issues with getting my back feeling good.  She too has said that she can feel the tightness in my back.  Unfortunately it's my way lower back that's pretty darn hard to stretch.

Sooooo my next call went to a massage therapist.  I'm still researching my options here.  When I asked my insurance company about massage therapy, they said it's not covered so....yeah.  That's next on my list of things to do.

So while from the outside it looks like I'm totally back to normal, I'm not quite there yet.  I didn't finish treatment and boom, life is perfect again.  I'll get there though.  For now, I need to just think of more embarrassing stories for you.

Oh!  Like the one where I had radiation burns so bad on my bum that they were open sores.  At one point they told me to make sure I keep the cream on it or my butt cheeks will stick together and heal that way.  While that was pretty terrifying at the time, it's a great story to hold on to and tell the grandkids someday.  And it goes over great in a bar when you're out drinking with your friends.

Speaking of drinking....we haven't really celebrated the completion of treatment yet.  I'm due for a party.  Hopefully the results from this scan will warrant a celebration as well.  And hey my birthday is coming so I'm not lacking reasons to have some fun. 

Fingers crossed for good results.  Here we go!